BUCHI EMECHETA: The Joys of Motherhood
“A man is never ugly”. Using this statement as your starting point, examine the relationship between men and women in the novel.
Explanation
The Joys of Motherhood “A man is never ugly”. Using this statement as stalling point, examine the relationship between men and women in the novel.
This belief is central to an understanding of the relationship between men and women in the novel. Nnaife’s friend makes this statement after Nnu Ego has lost her first son. The statement is meant to console Nnaife, Nnu Ego’s second husband who in his despondency and resignation declares that Nnu Ego hates him because she thinks he is ugly. Ironically, later Nnu Ego herself makes this statement about her husband: “…. He is a man, and you know men are never ugly”.
The society which is presented in he novel is male-dominated. The perceived differences between men and women are taught to children from an early age. The children therefore grow up accepting those “differences”. For example, when Oshia, Nnu Ego’s first son is asked to go and help the girls fetch water he retorts: “I am not going! I am a boy. Why should I help in the cooking? That’s a woman’s job.
” A lot of premium is put on the acquisition of male children. No one, not the man, nor the woman, would like a baby girl. This is the major cause of Amatokwu’s behaviour to Nnu Ego. Because boys realize how much they are adored, they in turn treat the girls with contempt. This attitude is endorsed by the parents.
Nnu Ego’s prayers to her “chi” to change her mind and give her a child were unanswered. Her husband, being the first son, was under pressure by his family to give them an heir. Nnu Ego is therefore casually informed by her husband move to a nearby but meant for older wives because his people have found him a new wife.
This development threatened her position as the senior wife coupled with the fact that the new wife took in within a month and later gave birth to a baby boy. Nnu Ego feels frustrated and hopeless especially with the way her husband a-eats her, ordering her about. . I will do my duty by you. I will come to your but when my wife starts nursing her child. But you can’t produce sons, a east, you can help harvest yams.
” Nnu Ego’s visits to her father did not help her situation. Though she has a cordial relationship with the other wife, having to breast feed her baby as if it was hers is seen as an abominable act. Caught in the act, she is beaten mercilessly by the husband. Her father is insulted and he later decides to take her home `so that she would be cool enough inside to be fertile..
Her departure from Amatokwu’s house leads to Nnu Ego’s rejuvenation regaining her weight, looking more attractive and leading to her second marriage and subsequent child bearing in her second husband’s home is proof that she is not barren. It also makes way for a change of setting in the plot of the novel; from rural to urban setting.